[The Lady and The Tick]

[Empress of Neon]

*A journal bound by a pink ribbon.*

For a time, I felt a sense of renewal and purpose. Looking back and facing the shades of the past. Remembering all my family and I lived and suffered. The good the bad.  Giving it some meaning. Leaving it to parchment and memory.

The pain never went away. But it became easier to pretend, at least.

To pretend  I was alright. That I had the strength to keep going.

But the more I keep my promise to live; to protect life, to tend the garden; the more I find myself asking a question that's begun to haunt.

Am I leaving her a better world?

I know this world is kinder than the one I knew. But Mirit's argument against my tolerance for the lesser evils left me disturbed.

I felt like I was arguing with her again. Not Mirit, but Meryl.

My sweet baby Meryl.

I walked  away from the conversation with Mirit yielding to her true self. But I found myself asking again and again when it was all over.



"What would my daughter say to me, if she just heard what I said?"



The schism between refugees and Ashfolk is growing. The contempt for corruption grows with its naked displays. They hate it, despite the alternatives. Especially my people.  And all the new refugees who keep something higher than dinars to their hearts.

They loath it all.

We've become our own greatest enemy. The luster of what the empire offers is stained. We've become so hopelessly corrupt, that even justice; the very thing The Wroth bades us to;  seems to have a price tag.

Charity has been bastardized. Kula would rage if she saw how her tenant had been twisted to benefit those already of station and wealth, instead  of the poor and meek.

Our Mother would weep. Seeing her children embrace the sins of gold.



It's starting all over again. Even here. The specter of rebellion  and ruin. Even with Diakos gone. That fire and thirst for a just world.

Even if it means destroying it.

I know I can't stop what's coming. Perhaps I never could. I can't change the tides of fate; no matter how much I wish otherwise.



It's a story I know all too well.



I don't know what to do anymore.



The Lady in me knows what will happen to Ephia's Well if discord and civil war unfolds. Every side will lose. The Sultanate, weakened and vulnerable to attack from our enemies, may very well ease to exist.

The rebels, even if they win, will be so hopelessly decimated that they will be naught but food for the looming vultures who thirst for the Well's Bounty.

How do I trust my enemies who'd build atop our graves  to protect life itself?



The Ticker in me knows this society's corrupt. No matter how much we try to change it from the inside, it's already succumbed to the same evil that destroyed the home my daughter loved.

Greed. Unchecked, without constraints, inflicting suffrage upon all but its select few champions.

I know in my heart she would've despised this place, if she'd seen what I had. Experienced what I've been put through. A different kind of tyranny; however softer or necessary it seemed to endure it.

Am I laying my hands to the foundations of another Old City? Majestic today, but a nightmare ages from now?



I know too much. Not just of the higher politics around the the world, Baz'eel and the realms beyond the citadel.

I know the secret of the Rose.

I've seen the sins of the Legion.

I know what horrors the Astronomers play with.



Protect life; Ephia's Well. So that life may go on; so that she has a world to awaken to again.

Tend the Garden; It is the world. All we leave behind, great and small. It is what will greet her when her eyes open.



There's no clear answer anymore.



Meryl.


What flowers do I leave for you, in the wake of my meager life?


What world do I toil to see bloom for you, my beautiful child?

[Empress of Neon]

The picture is complete. No amount of wishful thinking or pretty words can distract or deceive from the pattern.

I'm now convinced Sol Auk is trying to destroy Ephia's well from within. And he's succeeding.

We are divided, poor and vulnerable.

Radicals, gangs and viles are on the rise. Brookers, greedmaws and charlatans make up the body of our politicians.

Murder's become a privilege.

Those who could have stopped it chose not to.

Am I one of them?



I had a dream last night. It was her.

She was looking at a soft, blue light. Her arms crossed in a pout. Just like she used to.

She didn't look back at me. No matter how much I tried to speak, nothing came out. She couldn't hear me.

No matter how much I struggled to go to her, something kept me barred. Like a tide bading me away.

She turned. Enough for me to see her frown. Even if I couldn't see her eyes.

She frowned. Just like she used to. Every time I tried to rationalize the world to her.



I looked in my hand mirror after I awoke in tears.

I didn't recognize that woman either.

That person should've known better.



You know her heart.



I need to make things right.

[Empress of Neon]

It's done. No more dancing around it like a snake on the issue.

I may tell them it had to be done. That evil needed to be challenged.

And it did.

But honestly? This one was for you, baby girl.

It was always all for you.



I'll be set back again. Any aid I bring to Ephia's Well going forward will likely have to be from outside.

I might have to start looking at growing my business, once I'm done seeing the White League settled on a promise.

Coin, resources and perhaps a single intervention is the best I'll probably be able to do in the future. I doubt I'll have much a hand to offer in politics anymore.

That feels way more relieving than it probably should.



Might've gone further if not for Zaniah. Wasn't going to put Rennik in that awkward position in the primaries; sure as hell not going to do that to her.

Lady in me knows she's not wrong. Even if the Tick wants to put her foot down.

I'm just going to have to trust them to do the right thing when the times comes.

Wroth guide them; for they tangle with a serpent.



Ephia's Well is still haunted. And the fight for its soul is ongoing.

We have a series of crises that are barreling down on us.

We are perilously vulnerable. Not just to the threats to our lives, but the evil that bades us to make monsters of ourselves.

I don't know where my place will be in all of it. I only know dark times lay ahead of us.



It's going to get worse.

It's going to get so much worse.

[Empress of Neon]

Was going to set out into the Rustdunes today with the Oathseekers. Searching for baublium and technology.

Instead, I tripped and hurt my hip. Bad.

Today's the first day in a long time that I really felt old. Even useless, now that my time in politics is effectively over in Ephia's Well.

I have no intention of hiding behind walls and gates like I did when I was young. Letting other people fight my battles.



I came to tend to Ephia's Well. However that looks.  Not the other way around.

But I need to face the reality people who compliment me on my 'good shots' don't seem to realize.

I am weak. Always have been. And it's only going downhill from here.

I took the day to really sit on it. Coming to terms with everything. Ended up thinking about a road I didn't take in my life. Way back when.

Back when Ellan and I were still young. Still in blooming.



Cosine told me it's not too late. But that'll it be extremely dangerous.

Going to need some things. And see a few favors done.

I know it might kill me.



But I won't sit idly by while youths keep risking their lives. Or while my friends set to tasks that imperil them every day.

The woman who hid behind gates and walls died a long time ago.

No matter how much they beg otherwise, she's not coming back.



Ephia's Well can't wait years.

It has to be now.

[Empress of Neon]

Exiled. Not in the way I was half-expecting either. An opportunity seized by my enemies.

It is, to date, my greatest defeat in Ephia's Well. Although it is perhaps warranted this time, as I erred and endangered others.

What I wasn't expecting was how many people would turn on me. Especially Zaniah. After all I yielded and did for her, there was no compassion or willingness to temper justice.

It would have been death. Pointless, indignant and precedent for more tyranny.

Was Mirit right about you? Were you one of that monster's plants this whole time?


The irony that I've fled Kingward to escape a pit of vipers does not escape me.

This was your story to, wasn't it baby girl?

Moreso still that, in spite of it all, all I want is to see that place made safe. Its destiny remains. It must survive.


This will make all my plans that much more difficult to achieve. But it's a road that must be walked.

I had intended to continue advocating for the Sultanate, in spite of things, while I was out here.

That was, until, I heard about that slave auction of my dear Mirit. Until I saw that contract in my mail.

I was ready to devote my entire life to them. But this isn't service or redemption. This is slavery.

The same evil that put Kha'esh last on my 'to-do' list.

I can not accept that. She deserves a better world to awaken to.


I am well past the point where I can fight for the Well's soul, unfortunately.

I'd hoped it'd never come to this.

But sometimes, the auld ways really are the best.


You win, mother. Ellan.

We'll do it your way.

[Empress of Neon]

I am blessed to have such friends. Even if I wish they'd let go.

I know better than to challenge radiant hearts. Best I could ask is for them to keep low for now and continue to do the good work.

Mirit didn't end up enslaved; at least not more than a few moments. It still disgusts me that people are complacent to let it go unchallenged.

Why the royals haven't come down on it by now? I can only guess. But this is getting to the boiling point. Even for the locals.


Alejandro wasn't interested in any business ventures. Can't say I blame him. I know he has his hands full. And I know there's a lot going on beyond that.

Some of the folks back in the Purple League appear to have found their spines at least. To some extent, anyway. Afraid it's a bit too late now though.


Being here with all the quiet and honest folks has been balming, in a way. I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss Frostport. From its crayfish to its bitter. Hearths to banter.

It's just more wholesome. Even if I do find myself anxious at times about what's happening in the Well.


I dreamed for just a moment what it'd be like. Standing by the hearth. With her.

What would  you have thought of this place, baby girl? The people? The land? What would you have left them, my sweet little stonebuilder?

I think you would've liked them. They're a lot like Grandma Fitzgerald. And I know how much you loved her lullaby of distant shores.

I find it a little more than coincidence that both of your fathers trailed their people back to the brine and seas.

Or that I feel like I belong here more than any other place in the world. Even where I know I need to be.


I need to make some fucking money and put this to bed once and for all.