Messages

[Peyton]

[A letter returned, hastily written. The penmanship is oddly poor.]

Aurelio,

It was what I expected. I'm used to this.

I should have sat you down sooner and clarified.

It is what it is.

It isn't you, it's the student. Who enjoys playing victim to play on the sympathies of others. She enjoys turning people against me and feigning ignorance. I'm sure you can see it, now. It's a game I've removed myself from. There are more important things than her, anyway.

I'll take part in the play. Only because I know Onion has worked extremely hard. I want the coin back.

Perhaps it's best we kept distance, for now.

Peyton

Dearest Bashir,

PLEASE DON'T TELL BARAK I GOT HIS NAME WRONG!!!

I would very much like to see this moving town! I'm picturing great big yurts atop grand wooden chariots pulled by the most decorated and regal of Groknak... how divine! Perhaps we can ask Barak if we can do so!

I remember you telling me when I saw you on the Scald of this "Crown of the World." It's the first time I've ever heard of such a place! And it sounds absolutely phenomenal! But... I'm terrified of heights! I've only just gotten used to flying on an ashsail.

Coffee is an addictive substance, don't you know! Corty drinks it often, but I'll have to give your suggestion a try and see how I fair. Perhaps if we're both stimulated with coffee, these positive thoughts will be extra charged to encourage hair growth! It's a sound theory worth testing!

I'm looking forward to designing something with you! Corty is sure to trust me with his fashion choices!

Now comes the less fun part... I would love to hear your thoughts on the current state of the war, and our dealings with Kha'esh. You've got a real brain for politics, whether you like it or not, I think! It's one of your many jobs, after all, to keep tabs on these sorts of things. Do you think we'll be okay? Sometimes I wonder if Corty and I should run away and start a goat farm together.

Selwyn Najm

Dearer Bashy,

Yay! You wrote back!

If kohl truly is the manliest of male accoutrements, how come I don't see Mr. Burak wearing it! He is most manly... I do hope he's okay after what happened with Kha'esh. Have you heard from him at all? I'm noticing a severe lack of Big Chums on the Scald...

Anyways.

I know all about radiating feminininity! Perhaps that's what got between us... so much feminine energy can be dangerous (Just like how too much masculine energy can really stink up a whole room! Like when all the men from the College of the Lost Hearth are together!)! It's liable to be intimidating, making us unapproachable! And that'd be real bad! We have to stay approachable for our jobs, you know!

Lately, I've been getting a lot of migraines and tension headaches. I suffer a lot of stress! I'm blessed to already have unnaturally-but-natural white hair to hide errant grays... so maybe a tea of this noomi al-basri will do me some real good. I'll be sure to knock-knockity-knock-knock... knock-knock! on your door (that's the secret knock rhythym).

Gods forbid I ever go bald... that is the epitome of masculinity, and I can't ever be like that! EVER! It's Corty! Maybe there's a way to transplant some of his beard hairs onto his glistening scalp! Although, he is perfect just the way he is! Castor oil seems gross, maybe something like lavender! But maybe that radiates too much femininity. What's a masculine scent? Sandalwood? Musk? Are those oils?

I would love to work on the outfit with you! It'll be Corty's political regalia! The most important part are the sandals, you know. He says, and I quote: "You need to keep your toes spreadable." I think it's about staying well-balanced and mobile, or something.

But he's not a foot freak, I swear! No matter what the Sukaitza tell you! Fenton's the foot freak!

What strange timing. I quite literally stepped back into my home when I saw this letter, having just returned from running around looking for you! Now that I think about it, I didn't try knocking on your door...

Looking forward to seeing your pretty be-kohl'd face!
Selwyn Najm

[A LOT!]

Dear Bashy,

I am writing this letter from the comfort of my home to say hi! I feel like I haven't seen you in SO long, and it's just not fair! It's just not fair at all!

Thank you for always being my bestest friend in all of the Well... and my first love, too! Isn't that funny? Many months have passed that we can both look back on it and laugh. What a time! It took me a long while to realize that your eyelashes weren't just long, but you coloured them in with the richest kohl, too! And that just isn't what I am looking for in a man... you understand, I am sure!

Anyway.

Enough reminiscing of the past. Let us look forward to the FUTURE! Where we'll grow real old and drink tea together. Oh! We should do that. Drink tea! Catch up on the latest gossip, talk about people, places, things. You know A LOT! of stuff!

Speaking of; do you have any idea what one can do for a bald head? I am sure you know of some treatments or serums that can induce hair growth, and if not... how does one style a naked scalp!? It is not for me, you see. Corty's Prelate now, he should be most presentable for his higher station!

Anyway.

Let's catch up soon, please!

Your bestest friend who loves you lots but not like that anymore obviously,
Selwyn Najm

P.S. I think you forgot the outfit I asked you to make! But that's okay, I am sure you are incredibly busy and I don't want to stress you out anymore than you probably already are, considering everything going on!

P.S.S. Always here for you!

Taking a wee break. Will be back in the future. x

Gone from the 10th to the 12th or 13th!

Roadtrippin'!

Dear Chief Scribe Frederica Ashbury and Scribe Kulam Kulan,

I hope this message finds you well. On behalf of Apothar Zol Nur and Q'tolip's Tower, I am reaching out to discuss a potential project atop Eagle's Mount. Specifically, we are interested in the supply and installation of a "Sending Bellows Head."

For this endeavor, we are initially prepared to offer ten thousand dinari, though we remain open to adjustments based on your expert evaluation and the requirements you might identify. We would greatly appreciate it if you could provide us with a preliminary outline of what might be needed from our side to facilitate the completion of this project.

We truly value the work your organization carries out and are eager to enhance the cooperative relationship that exists between us. Looking forward to future collaborations and the mutual benefits they will bring.

Warmest regards,
Nadiri Selwyn Najm

it is all my fault

im sorry sally
im sorry fior
im sorry dudley

im sorry everyone

i had to make a decision
i did not make it
my indecision led to this

i do not deserve these robes
i failed

i have to do better.
i need to be better.

A small letter is cut and pasted to fit into the journal.



i just want to be loved

I believed I was losing pieces of myself every day; whether given freely, or taken away.

It is what I do. And that is what this place does.

I give and I give and I give...
and it takes and it takes and it takes and it takes and it takes and it takes.

Lost forever.

But perhaps that isn't true.

Maybe it has all gone to this other me.

Frigid indifference.

I will not let it consume me.

Selwyn Najm

I should have started something like this a long time ago. I hear it's a good way to get your thoughts in order.

But mine are so chaotic all the time.

It's easy to put on a smile, it doesn't take much to be kind. Sometimes, at least. Nobody likes a sourpuss, nobody likes someone who's sad all the time. Play the part, make them love you.

But why? What for?

Friend to all, ally to none. That's what he once told me. Truthfully, who can I actually, really, TRULY count on?

Everyone has an agenda. Everyone wants and needs something. The history of this place runs so deep, people carry vendettas, people hold grudges, people hate people.

I suppose it's far easier to focus on the negatives.. but that is all this place is. It's rotten to its core. I've seen it.

Oh, no. I know why I never wrote in a journal. This is far too lonely. Too sad.

Just talk to someone. That's a far better method. But who?

Who...

I constantly feel as if people hide things from me. Isn't that funny, though? Ironic? A Nadiri of the Tower, upset that they feel people conceal things from them.

Who gave me the right?

Al-Basri called me stupid today. I think she's right. Far too trusting, because I want to see the good in people. I need to.

But everyone does the wrong thing. Everyone is continuing to do the wrong thing. But is my judgement much better? My own greed has caused much turmoil.

So much wrong.

Don't lose that shine.

On and on.

But I am not strong.

[The letter is... stained. The handwriting is... frantic.]

starlight,

i want halim back
how do i bring him back
please help me