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Thank you to all who contributed. Excited to keep telling tales for the years to come.

After nigh on a year, the war against Iakmes is drawing to a close. It has been a wild road, and what better way to tie things up than a stupid weekend long roleplay festival.

EFU is planning an ambitious and immersive weekend of events and roleplay. In scope it is analogous to a chapter ending. Expect to experience broad, sweeping events, small plots, ambient DM encounters, and much more.

So how will it work?

Players will, on Friday afternoon, gain the option to 'go to war' from the Eagle's Mount. This is a one-way journey, with no return to the Well possible until the events ending on Sunday. This is to say players that go to war will be based elsewhere for the duration of the weekend.

Each day is important, and shall play host to 'big' events of some stripe. I don't expect you all to NEET out for the entire weekend but it would be really lovely to see as many of you there as possible.

We're really proud of what we've achieved this far, and are mega excited to share all of our hard work with you players.

A few bits of housekeeping:

Entering the venue of the finale event is an explicit acknowledgement of the risk of permadeath. If your PC dies, they will not return (with one exception that shall be announced at a later date).

If you have an active character, we would strongly discourage the use of alts, and the event will not be recorded. If you are in between PCs, it is acceptable to role one for the purposes of joining in.

If your PC is not coming to the war, feel free to log on but when big events happen you may be asked to log off for the duration.

Times for various things over the weekend will be announced imminently, so please keep an eye on discord.

So, then. We're nearly done.

All that's left is Bet Nappahi.

The EFU DM Team

doc i love u but lol

Just a short note regarding the issue of slavery, as it seems that some people are confused about its place in the setting.

No major or minor state or civilization within the Great Ash Desert practices chattel slavery. It is considered an unspeakable taboo and we have little interest in pursuing these themes moving forward in V6.

This is not to say highly unequal societies or class systems do not exist, they certainly do. But slavery as is popularly understood is not something people could reasonably expect to happen.

The Sibilant Empire (or its remnant) is the only major exception to this rule, as historically they were a slave society, although it is unknown if they currently practice slavery.

In the early hours of the mornning, a gilded Ashsail was seen berthing at the Eagle's Mount, arrived from the direction of Baz'eel. A hobbling figure daubed in green was soon seen boarding the vessel, which set off without delay towards the Sublime Garden.

[Old Man Trips on Wall]

Hziran 20th, IY 7789

Old Man Trips on Wall

The Parchment can EXCLUSIVELY reveal the details of a brutal battle fought at an Orcish fortification deep in the Scald. It is said the so-called Purple Pair - former Legate Marcellus Saenus (you've got to love him!) and then-Legate Achaeus Saenus (any relation???) led the combined forces of Baz'eel and al-Nasr to a great victory over the barbarian foe.

All of Baz'eel mourned to hear that Marcellus, who was in his dotage even during his early Legateship, tragically tripped over the so-called 'Abulmahhu' and cracked his skull, dying some hours later surrounded by his loved ones. The beloved leader - who some call the Unifier, because he united the hearts of all the people - was buried in an official state funeral some days.

Any rumours to the contrary are categorically false.

The Emir's Gaffe

During the recent state visit of Emir Jaiyan Ibn Sharev to Golden Baz'eel, the hapless ruler committed a dreadful breach of protocol that remains the subject of lurid gossip and speculation within the Sublime Garden.

The Parchment can EXCLUSIVELY reveal the indelicate blunder of the bungling baron.

During a morning Water Service, the Emir neglected to refer to our Beloved Sovereign by his just and rightful title 'Overthrower of Abuses and Scourge of Bad Governance', and furthermore wore a turban that was off colour to the mutually agreed Water Service Palette.

Osman, being benevolent and furthermore gracious, merely smiled at this outrageous breach of protocol. However, in the weeks which have followed, courtiers have grown to see a shocking reality. Far from an innocent blunder, Jaiyan Ibn Sharev, as is typical from those of his treasonous line, instead intended this omission as a calculated SNUB!?

Something simply must be done.

Useless Old Trees; Kindling for the Front!

A genius strategem has been devised upon the front in the hateful Scald. So great are the corpse-mounds of the barbarian dead, our brave boys have been complaining about the terrible stench of their rotting flesh.

The Tenth Legion to the rescue! The Parchment can EXCLUSIVELY reveal that the brave Tenth have settled upon an ingenous strategy of using the great KUSATMA to blow up some rotten, useless old trees (who heard of trees out there anyway?) in order to build orderly and handsome pyres - eliminating the twin scourges of Toxic Odour and litter in one fell swoop.

Keep it up, boys!

Inside Kusatma - A Welder's Tale

Serialized EXCLUSIVELY in the Parchment over the coming months- the true story of how one metallurgist with a dream took some battered old bronze and fashioned it into a wonder if Baz'eeli engineering - the fearsome KUSATMA, whose howls can be heard even as far as the Sublime Garden itself.

With nothing but his hands, his humble workshop and an uncompromising vision, Tairan ibn Ghalish tells all, in:

I AM BECOME DEATH, DESTROYER OF WORLDS

Azarmidokht Parties while World Burns

The Golden Vizier's depraved and decadent diversions continue, with the salacious sorceror hosting yet another masquerade ball while the brave Janissaries of Baz'eel's Fourth fight and die beneath the wicked heat of Pra'raj (some say at his cruel bidding). The venue? Our very own Osmani Canal!!!

The Parchment can EXCLUSIVELY reveal that Azarmidokht the Golden, using moneys embezzled from the illegal sack and occupation of our dear little sibling Arslan, has purchased a luxurious pleasure barge from which he hosts weekly debaucheries.

What is going on in there? Are slaves involved? Why is the Parchment not invited?

Whatever is happening, it can't be good. Baz'eel MUST seize and impound this bawdy barge.

Sorazin Bey Recalled to Baz'eel

The Parchment can EXCLUSIVELY reveal that Sorazin Bey, the tragic scion of the antique al-Komayyad clan and commander of the Fourth Legion, has been urgently recalled to the Sublime Garden for a private audience with our very own Sultan Osman the Sixth, Sultan of Baz'eel &c.

At the time of printing the Scribes are currently drafting an exquisite letter of invitation that will no doubt dazzle the benighted Bey, who is (in our humble opinion) sorely deserving of such a fantastic and mysterious honour!

Oops, did we spoil the surprise?!?

Silver Drake's Baby Feast in Occupied Arslan?!

Notorious turncoat and murderer 'Silver Drake', lately the Envoy of the Sordid Vizier, is rumoured to be participating in cannibalistic excesses as part of the ongoing tragedy of Arslan. The Parchment cannot print some of the more shocking reports it has received, but it would encourage shrewd subscribers to read between the lines and make up their own minds.

He has been furthermore rumoured to be kicking street dogs for sport, and has a perverted shrine to a notable member of the Sovereign Clan hidden in a filthy den he maintains in that City, which the Parchment can EXCLUSIVELY reveal has not been cleaned in months.

This event has been pushed back a week to resolve scheduling issues and also take the toolset weight off myself a tiny bit.

Thanks folks.

[Ashbury]

A rough postscript is attached.

Legates,

Allow me to unspool this act of courtly rhetoric for you.

Baz'eel commands, in the name of decorum and civilization, that you summon the Ambassador and Envoy of Kha'esh to the Assembly Hall before the Voiced, decry their occupation of Arslan and demand that the City is ceded to the protection of Ephia's Well immediately.

And under no circumstances are you to threaten them with military force.

Good luck.

Ashbury
Chief Scribe

[Rectification of Certain Historic Injustices, in which Glories, Unity and Eminence are Exalted over Schismatic and Hungry Jackals]

A letter upon elaborate and expensive papyrus, inlaid with all manner of golden designs and illustrations, gorgeous calligraphy, sealed with the personal style of Osman VI al-Maribid.

Rectification of Certain Historic Injustices, in which Glories, Unity and Eminence are Exalted over Schismatic and Hungry Jackals

for the attention of the Legates of Ephia's Well, cc. Chief Scribe & Deputy Chief Scribe

Honoured Legates,

Now that the die has been cast, it has ocurred to we in the Sublime Garden, being the most glorious and shining of servants of He who sits upon the Eagle Chair, would profit from taking our hand - with all paternal and gentle affection - and place it upon the shoulder of the great Asterabadian experiment. In doing so, we should thereupon enlighten you (who are, after all, foreign to our Sultanate and its dazzling customs) upon certain matters of diplomatic protocol, which must be rightly observed in the inexorable and virtuous unification of an estranged appendage into the bosem of Mother Baz'eel.

To wit, the Emirate of Kha'esh must be formally and expressly informed of the moral and religious stance that has been adopted by the government of Ephia's Well with regards to the wellspring of the Tutelage, which is to say instead the Bronze Wadi, which is of course to properly say the City of Arslan; presently occupied by the Kha'eshi.

You must, in short and in fact, summon the representatives of Jaiyan Ibn Sharev, Emir of Kha'esh, before an Assembly of your people, and in that place make it known with your words that you, being the invested sovereigns of Ephia's Well, take objection to their continued exploitation of this Arslan, and demand its passing from their care into your own.

You may wonder, being (no doubt) beholding of no small measure of acuity and observance; why, when some decisive act against Schismatic and Hungry Jackals has been settled upon, you should alert them then to the contours of your thought? A fine question, and a subtle one indeed, yet one that nonetheless reveals your station as one estranged from the inner soul of Baz'eel that shines golden.

For it has ever been so, that in matters of dispute, that demands be made openly and without fear. This track is worn by convention, a highway befitting the dignity of a Legate of Ephia's Well and a servant of the sovereign in Baz'eel. This shall, no doubt, alert the Jackal to your ambition. Yet not, we pray, to your resolve. Indeed you must cloud this resolve, and speak only of deep and gentle sentiments and the steely demands that issue therefrom.

To allude to the Legions, which are without number, and of their stern power would be uncivilized and furthermore unwise, we should counsel against uttering such a barbarity.

You have made a decision, most momentuous: to assert yourselves as great satraps of His Great Sublimity,

Osman the Sixth al-Maribid;

Sultan of Baz'eel, Sultan of Qa'im, Sultan of Kha'esh, Sultan of Qadira, Sultan of Arslan, Sultan of Ephia's Well &c., Overlord of Il Modo, Protector of the Sea of Pearls and of the Satrapies, Grand Suzerain of Banafsi, Beloved of the Mother and of the Magi and of the Wheel Entire, Defender of the Orthodoxies and of Heterodoxies, Grand Chancellor of the Academies and of the Bright Madrassa, al-Nasr.

In this station you have claimed, you are most blessed. A twofold blessing, of glory and civilization. Make offerings at the Temple of B'aara, and wear no sandals when you do so. Ponder upon the mantle you have assumed.

It shall weigh upon you heavily henchforth.

In the Mother's Grace, in the service of He Most Sublime, we are

Siursum Avak Res,
Serene Majordomo of the Ecstatic Terrace

Ghur-Utal Pasha, 'Mekelglim'
Fifth Undersecretary of the Extant Adliye

Azmir ibn Kalam,
Secretary.

Hello folks,

In future can everyone please give a brief explanation of what type of PVP you are expecting to engage in when asking for DM oversight, especially if you are looking to FD another PC.

Low effort 'DM for PVP????' should be avoided. Slightly higher effort 'Hello DM. I would like to beat up Deputy Chief Scribe Bashir Khatara and destroy his lewd novels in front of him' is closer to how you should post.

Thank you.

Aubrey,

I have received your letter. It would behoove us to discuss this, I think.

- Arkaeos.

Cool idea but I don't think there is any appetite to develop this right now.

[EATER OF EYES GOUGED]

Subat 25, IY 7788

EATER OF EYES GOUGED

For a nigh hundred years he has been the scourge of the Sultanate. His wolf-riders have ranged deep into our lands, and set villages to the torch. We recall with sorrow the places lost to his reiving - Üzgün, Büyük Şehir, Kayip. At the Battle of the Boundary, he slew a hundred men with his own hand, and sowed terror wherever he walked.

No more.

It was a stunning victory. We fell upon his soldiery in the night as they engaged in vile orgies. Their tents were set to flame, the terror that the Eater of Eyes visited for so long upon the Sublimate realm was placed upon him instead. They are calling it the Battle of the Crag, yet it was no true battle. Rather, the slaughter was great and glorious. The Fourth and Ninth Janissary Legions, together, have won laurels for themselves.

Sergeant Ibal Utim, a dashing human of the Fourth who lead the assault - they are calling him the DEFEATER OF EYES - had this to say to the Parchment:

"All for the Sultan, everything for Osman, all for he - upon his lips we fell upon them howling. We have made a banner of his skull, which shall, in time, be returned to the Garden where our children shall gawp at it as a curiorisity. Victory is close, now."

Captain Immet of the Ninth, who is so handsome the Parchment might be sick, reports that his beloved vessel Devout - while battered and bruised - is now in working order again after working thirty hours without sleep to get her fixed up.

Can we go for a ride?

OUTBREAKS OF MADNESS AT THE SCALDING

Strange, unexplained fits of madness have begun to beset the war-camp of the Great Serdar. A spate of gruesome suicides have been discovered, and the sounds of screaming can be heard from tents at night. The cause of this malady is uncertain, for the Taffavogh have been strenuously avoided.

The soldiers are growing nervous, and the disciples of Azarmidokht are seeking a cause for this strange and disturbing development.

IL MODO - The SINKING City?!

Reports from the notorious city of Il Modo are coming in that suggests the city is SINKING beneath its own weight. Perhaps it is the size of their heads that has tipped the balance?

[Kardesler on the March!]

Subat 19th, IY 7788

Kardesler on the March!
Yataghan, the Great Serdar of Kha'esh, has done the unthinkable: he has walked with none has dared ere the great Scald was formed those long years ago. The Academies are abuzz with scholarly discontent, it was believed that such a desiccated place would quickly swallow up any host that attempted to traverse it.

The Parchment witnessed as the Serdar was the first man to step over the precipice into the Scalded land. He kneeled down and picked up some dirt of the land between his fingers, remarking:

"Ash the same as any other - ho, onwards. Nappahi awaits."

Then many horns sounded, and the dust raised by their march made a cloud that could be seen upon the horizon for many leagues.

The host has hitherto faced little true opposition. They are systematically levelling barbarian nests that litter the Scald, yet no enemy battle has appeared upon the field to challenge the march. It is believed by the Serdar that the great number of the enemy awaits at Bet Nappahi itself, which remains many leagues to the west.

It is said that dehydration and weariness afflicts the army, and that many have died already of these terrible cruelties. This is only the beginning, and Academicians report that casualties of this kind are likely to far outweigh any that fall in battle.

Grand Tutors in Ephia's Well?
The Parchment can exclusively reveal that the turbulent Satrapy of Ephia's Well is secretly sheltering the Arslani government-in-exile, although they have not been seen in public and none can confirm where they might reside. There has thus far been no official response from the Emirate of Kha'esh, although none can say what their presence means for the fragile Union of Kardesler.

Why the Well has given the Tutors asylum is unknown, yet readers of this publication should not be surprised at this wild and unruly maneuverer from the government of that Satrapy. When will the Sultan bring them to heel?

Emir Jaiyan at the Sublime Garden
In a remarkable turn of events, Emir Jaiyan Ibn Sharev is presently enjoying the lauded hospitality of Osman the Sixth, the great suzran of the Great Ash Desert. No Kha'eshi ruler has visited Baz'eel for half a millennia, since the traitorous Sharev sundered his city from the Caliphate amidst the melancholy of Harrowing.

It is said the Emir is mesmerized by the glories of the Sublime Garden, and that he and the Sultan have together supped from the Edutu Fount. The true cause for the Emir's visit is a strict confidence, with even the most elevated functionaries of court perplexed as to the significance of this exceptional turn of events.

Mining Operations Resume in Arslan
After a fretful negotiation, Ghalish & Sons have resumed their mining operations in Arslan under the watchful eyes of Kha'eshi overseers. The Parchment reports that a deal was cut at the last minute allowing the mining consortium to retain profitability while diverting the greater part of the precious metals to the Emirate of Kha'esh.

Hassan Ibn Ghalish, the consortium's representative in Arslan, is reportedly privately furious at this turn of events. Whispers say that his father overruled his plan to scuttle the mining operations and withdraw Ghalish Specialists from Arslan in protest at the extractive Kha'eshi terms.

Defection!
A provincial notable, 'Silver Drake', has reported defected from the government of Ephia's Well to the Emirate of Kha'esh. It is said the man was a cannibal and a deviant, wanted by the Sultan's Fourth for his grotesque crimes.

This meddling in local politics gives us pause, and is especially ill-timed considering the delicate events in the Garden proper. Can the Kha'eshi be trusted? The jury is out.

Titans of Dawning Gathering in Great Numbers
The feared Titans are said to be gathering in the deep desert, in groups as large as five. Waradim report seeing them kneeling, or uttering deep groans, or pressing their faces (if we might call them faces) deep into the earth. This ominous development is concerning, with a taskforce of Academicians reported to be consulting the ancient texts to develop weapons with which to fight these dread foes from older times.

Seekers-after-Death Quiet
After a glorious punitive campaign against guerilla columns within the Sultanate, the so-called Seekers-after-Death are scattered and in disarray. The 11th Legion has taken the lead, with merchant caravans gaining confidence to travel the trade routes. The last of the great bandit nests was scourged by the Scour but two days ago, and a minor triumph was held at Admasu Bezabh for their Bey. - glory to Osman and his Janissaries!

[YATAGHAN]

Attend me at your leisure, dread magus.

YATAGHAN