Author Topic: Letter to Bernard Glitt /DM  (Read 106 times)

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I love cats

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on: September 15, 2021, 07:39:17 AM
[A letter and a bottle of Velstra Velvet is left for Bernard Glitt.]

Dear Bernard Glitt

Bring Skudge back and return to drinking your retainers are cowardly and with how useless they are. You and them may as well drink.  They did nothing to fight for the ancestral lands of your forefathers.  However they will not hesitate to defend planar freaks and other subhumans of Ticker Square.  The people who destroyed your ring walk around the Peerage unmolested and uncontested by your so called retainers. With such retainers you and them should just drink. I  personally will order the bartenders to pour you drinks of the finest vintage should you wish to imbide. I would offer to slay these Moonspear oathbreaking scum for your daughter's hand.  Seeing that your son was some changeling monstrosity I do not wish to risk disgrace or tainting the bloodline of Dorvant Drinnaught. That honor belongs to Egbert.


-Henry Velstra
« Last Edit: September 15, 2021, 07:59:22 AM by I love cats »



Pigadig

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on: September 15, 2021, 08:00:09 AM
Dear Henry the Clown,

My Lord wishes to thank you for your most recent attempt at being funny, and has informed me he rates it three fingers out of five.

He would've given you a better score, however, had you not the habit of being resoundingly spanked by your one armed brothers whilst having two perfectly good ones. Not wanting to intimidate you into a blubbering mess, he stuck with counting only on one hand.

Try harder next time, for surely you will amount to something, at some point in the distant future. Like your brothers!

- Armsman Wull



I love cats

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on: September 15, 2021, 08:04:16 AM
I hope your lord enjoyed the Velstra Velvet!

-Henry Velstra