An application for Palatial Executioner to Legate Dragon

[zerotje]

ESTEEMED LEGATE DRAGON,

Writes to you now is Recluta Jazar Bazan with application.

Wish to engage you or perhaps broader; the Palatial Pyramid (though I address you for I feel most close to your platform); with an idea for a formal posititon.

I have a creative mind and particular affinity for (righteous) Death.

There appears to be no Executioner in your Court. Instead, the executions are handled by the (purple) Janissaries. Steal this away from them subtly. Less power to them, more to you.

Jazar had already doodled methods of execution, but exempted it from the letter. Due to concerns about coming across professionally...

Thus in letters and text only.

1. Hammer-to-skull, sounds simple? Yes... But make Myth of it. Create special great maul named "The Splash", crowd of macarbe onlooked chanting Splash! Splash! Splash! You can hear, yes? Excitement.

2. Catapult-to-guilty, exploding bodies with a rain of innards as result.

3. Spin The Wheel. Casino game, with faithful spin to it. Spoke it lands on determines execution method.
Unwashed masses: SPIN. THE. WHEEL.
B'aara: Drown Barrel
Agaslakku: Spear Barrel
Izdu: Bludgeon with Asterabadi Book (nobody reads it anyway)
Kula: Orentid Lions (classic)
Gellema: Roll Dice one to six.
one: Drink booze until body failure or drown in booze.
two: Stabbed.
three: Slashed.
four: Pierced.
five: Bludgeoned.
six: Released. (You can fix the Wheel to land on Gellema and fix the Dice to land on Six. Release whoever you want!)
Warad: Release guilty party on the road without mending their health. Prepare hunters ("Waradim") release guilty party count to five. Hunt and kill.
Kalim & Galim: Burry the guilty alive.
Wroth: The guilty party's alledged victim must slay the guilty. Refusal by victim is crime and affront to God. If victim is not present; prosecution may slay the guilty.
(Ninth Spoke): Snake pit <-- OPTIONAL!!

4. Throw down from Palatial Pyramid ashsail dock or Q'tolip's cliffs. Maybe I aim the guilty down on someone you dislike. Oops mistake. (Use Spyglass before launch)

5. Private execution (maybe you need to fuel a ritual?) Jazar sees, hears and remembers nothing.

6. Burn at stake, Jazar is good with oil flasks and torches. Traditional. Maybe there is accidentally bomb-barrel placed at stake and someone you dislike has to light the stake and by the Wheel what happened here.

...

Jazar hopes he has demonstrated his potentional but marks that this list could be endless and it mostly would have to be ammended and changed to the will and demands of the Legate(s).


With admiration and respect,

Recluta JAZAR BAZAN

[big metal rod]

RECLUTA,

Charmed was I to receive such a profoundly well considered petition; should the state allow, perhaps we can see this vision of yours become a reality.

Have you made your commanding officers aware of your grand ambition?

-ARGENT,
LEGATE
DRAGON

[zerotje]

LEGATE DRAGON,

JAZAR has let them know.

They granted, Banda likes Gold.

Please let me know what desires the Legate of Jazar.

[zerotje]

Dear Legate Argent the Dragon,

Here writes Jazar Bazan!

Please let me know your approval on the Palatial Executioner prospect.
Come, I make dead of criminals in your name, name of Ephia's Well's Legates.

Janissaries are stupid, so strip this away from them!

I also work for Tariq Salah and wear Twindari deathmasque! We can frame this into a Holy task.
Janissaries will protest against Twindari? It would be so shameful.

Gold will hold.

JAZAR BAZAN

[big metal rod]

Recluta Jazar,

You can anticipate an official appointment when funds allow.  Currently the cost of creating such a position would burden the state.  Ten-thousand dinari more will see it done.

Start sharpening your blades, if you would.

-ARGENT,
LEGATE,
DRAGON

[zerotje]

Jazar is honored.
His hammers will gather no rust in dutiful wait.

Up the Gold.