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[Tammuz 20th, IY 7788]

Tammuz 20th, IY 7788

I find it difficult to think about anything except the "lost time" earlier.

I cannot imagine what I could have done, how I acted or behaved, or worse yet, what was said. If I embarrassed myself, then I apologize.

It was pleasant to get to speak to you, admittedly. I was concerned that you were far too busy with all your new charges to make any time for such.

To that point, it is clear to me now that this new surge of Acolytes, including the early arrival of Sister Jamei in this cycle, is your countermove.

To have Selsi and Jamei operating concurrently within the cycle will mean having to tread ground perilously close to that which has seen my predecessors defeated, but so be it.

My next move is locked in. Even if you can see it, countering it should be an impossibility at this stage.

[Tammuz 9th, IY 7788]

Tammuz 9th, IY 7788

Qari wishes a fresh start. I have cautiously agreed to such, but I will be ever-mindful of the possibility of betrayal. If he thinks this will trip me up, he will be sorely mistaken.

The Torchbearers seem open to my proposed arrangement. I am hopeful that we can resume descents shortly. I will finish what I started down there.

I have been able to keep myself adequately distracted, for the most part.

It would be easier if you had not sent Selsi away on some errand right when I most need the diversion she would present.

Or perhaps you sent her away to keep things fair... I don't imagine I would be able to engage your finest piece at my best, admittedly.

And what of "Margarethe"? Did you expect her arrival? Have you made plans to counter this most unexpected of moves?

It's okay to admit that you did not. I will not think any less of you.

how did you get up there

Dear Janissary Officers,

With the death of my Apprentice, I wish to discuss collaboration efforts between our two organizations.

In particular, I wish to know which Astronomers you would favor working with in his stead.

Our organizations work closely together and I mean to see that there is no lapse in such cooperation.

Regards,
Apothar Estellise Azimi

With all our cool changes, efusl character details are starting to look a little weird

I don't see my Painting Ranks or my Skill Focus: Painting on it

It's not a huge deal or anything, but it'd be nice to fix at some point in the future!

Dear Marcellus,

As you have forsworn your oaths to Izdu, it makes little sense for you to manage a Temple of Izdu. I propose you rename the Temple to The Cosine Mevura Memorial Library.

It is the least you can do after sending him to his death. It is the least you can do after forcing him to participate in your blood sacrament.

Best,
Estellise Azimi

[Tammuz 4th, IY 7788]

Tammuz 4th, IY 7788

I need to write. I need to distract myself. I need my mind to process these feelings.

I was never close to my siblings. The Empress adopted many girls for their excellence and I met few of them before the fall.

This is what I imagine having a close sibling is supposed to feel like, however. This is what I imagine it is like to have that relationship torn from you, like having your own arm ripped off.

"Tomorrow will be very dangerous for me, but it is necessary to maintain the alliance. The Janissaries respect me because they respect the shared service. I can't just skip over a warfront because I'm afraid or tired. It's the entire crux of the bond."

"I have little worry about your safety, otherwise I would not have sent the Throater to you to be killed."

If only I had held some inkling of what was to come.

"The djinn that reached out in the Legate's office-- I saw them. All of them, around me. They were dead. Long-dead. Skeletons, the flesh picked off their bones. Sitting, grinning for eternity, at each other. They died there, together, in the office."

Except, I did. A vision of death visited him the night before the battle, but I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn't even consider the connection. I am so angry right now but at myself most of all.

It's easy to blame everything on the djinn when there are so many other forces at play in this world. But he said it with such confidence, that I believed it out of hand like a fool. I usually would doubt such assertions, except when it was most important not to.

"Marcellus is my friend."

Was he? Would a friend sacrifice you to his newfound faith? That is what this is. The Red Hill will appear as a petty trifle compared to this conflict, Marcellus's blood sacrament to his dark god. If ever he considered Cosine a friend, those days are long gone.

Or perhaps he considered this act a way to honor that friendship. Analysis of the mind of a fanatic is impossible.

Writing isn't helping as much as I was hoping it would. My heart hurts. My body is tired. I just want to sleep forever.

It's not going to be the same without you T_T

Our PCs had such a crazy deep sibling-type bond that is unlike anything I've ever done before

Thank you for playing with me so many late nights!

Dear Alejandro,

Your amendments to the People's History are appreciated. While I would describe my Fatespinner garb as "beguiling" or "bewitching" and not "seductive", beauty is in the eye of the beholder. At least it's not as bad as the other description. I will endure your adjective of choice in this case.

That said, I at no point purchased the bed of Shane Gallows. I believe it was purchased by the Tower for use in an experiment? I do not fully recall the events in question, since they were a year ago and not particularly noteworthy. The bed was destroyed promptly during said experiment, however. I never reclined in it to rest or eat chocolates.

In fact, I never slept in it even while I was employed by Mr. Gallows. The bed was made of stone and not even remotely comfortable, so I exclusively my room in the Krak. It's not to say I would not recline and eat chocolates in a bed, however, I just feel it paints a non-serious picture of my person.

Typically, if I am in a bed and not sleeping, I am doing non-snack-based leisure activities. Getting crumbs of food in a bed you sleep in is a horrid thing to imagine.

Regards,
Estellise Azimi

Dear Dervish of Warad,

I apologize for not including your name, but I have yet to learn it.

It has come to my attention that you and I share a common foe: the memory of Lynneth.

Let us meet to discuss matters further. I wish to hear your thoughts and determine how much they align with my own. And perhaps most importantly, what should be done.

Regards,
Estellise Azimi

[Hziran 31st, IY 7788]

Hziran 31st, IY 7788

It is worse than I thought.

Cosine and Mae have fallen into indolent patterns which it will be difficult to break them of. Obviously, that won't stop me from trying.

Zain is largely fine, despite being possessed by the essence of Xon, the worst Nadiri. I do not expect the matter will be difficult to resolve for a Witch, however. Xon's clumsy work is adjacent to my own Hex Magic.

I have met the one who sought to usurp my position and she is less irritating than I expected.

I heard you welcome me back, but you did not welcome her back. I am certain that you are well aware which of us is your opponent across the Xiangqi board.

My apologies for keeping you waiting, but I am prepared to resume our game.

With the removal of slow from Solar Circle maybe this spell could return to working like other scrolls and be useable by all arcane casters, pretty pleeease

Dear Estellise of Unknown Worldline,

It is not indolence to check in with a friend, let alone one who has yet a part to play in preventing the Disaster.

A Fatespinner is always on time, obviously. If you thought I would return three weeks ago, then your talents are significantly lacking compared to my own.

Additionally, I am not returning because you told me to. I am returning because I wish to handle matters that have deteriorated substantially in my absence, particularly regarding MY Apprentices.

Regards,
Estellise Azimi

[Hziran 29th, IY 7788]

Hziran 29th, IY 7788

I can't stop thinking about how irritating it is. I bet those wretches like her better than me too.

I liked hearing from Cosine, but I would have preferred to hear from Mae. She has likely grown more unreasonable and unruly in my absence.

I hate having to return empty-handed, but it seems that my non-interference plan did not go in the direction I had hoped for. In 26% of futures, my absence saw Mae rise to power and grow as a person. In 13% of futures, it was Cosine.

Regrettably, we have entered into the suboptimal 61%, where neither of my apprentices has done so, and worse yet, they have let other interlopers gain far too much ground on them.

It is past time that I set things to right.

Dear Selsi,

If you think I have been idle and blind to the goings-on of Ephia's Well, you are sorely mistaken.

Everything that has bloomed is because I have willed it to be so. That which has failed to take root was also my doing.

That said, my foolish Apprentices have failed to offer you sport in my absence, so I will return to the table once more.

Regards,
Estellise Azimi